Today's Texts

Today I got a text message from someone I met out last weekend and it was really hysterical. I didn't know who it was at first because I did not have his number. Here is the convo:

Guy: "Blap"

Me: "Ok. And who is this?"

Guy: "(states his name), you fart twat!"

Me: "It's about time, you cum dump! I actually figured this was you baha."

Guy: "Cuz you're a floosie with a fat cunt."

Me: "I am, actually. It's incredible. You're welcome."